| name | connection-finder |
| description | Finds specific, genuine "like you" hooks between the writer and a cold-outreach target — the bridges that turn a generic email into one that feels hand-written. Takes the recipient dossier and the writer's profile (about-me.md) and surfaces ranked angles. Use after recipient-research is done, before drafting. Triggers on "like you," "find a connection," "what do we have in common," "common ground." |
Connection finder
Source: points/cold-email-rules.md rule 5 — "Compare yourself to the recipient — the 'like you' move."
Why this exists
Rachel Konrad's rule 5 is the most-failed rule in the playbook. Most "like you" lines are either:
- Generic — "Like you, I believe AI will transform the future." (Everyone believes that. Cut.)
- Self-diminishing — "Like you, but at a vastly smaller scale." (They already know that. Cut.)
- Boastful — "Like you, I'm super smart and super successful." (Backfires. Cut.)
What works: specific, genuine, slightly unexpected. A "like you" line should reference a sensory detail from your shared origin that cannot be sent to anyone else — a specific cuisine you both grew up with, a specific city you both lived in for a specific year, a specific job you both did before the one you're emailing about. That's the whole point.
What you need
This skill takes two inputs:
- Recipient dossier (from
recipient-research)
- Writer's profile (
context/about-me.md or equivalent)
If either is missing, run recipient-research first or ask the user to point you at their about-me file.
What to look for
Cross-reference the two profiles for overlap in these eight categories. The further down the list, the higher the leverage.
1. Career parallel (medium — common)
Worked at the same company, in the same industry, in similar roles. Use only if there's a specific overlap — same product, same team, same era.
2. Educational parallel (low — overused)
Same school. Useful only with a specific shared experience (same professor, same class, same dorm). "Stanford MBA" alone is too generic.
3. Geographic / origin parallel (medium — strong if specific)
Same hometown. Same immigration story. Lived in the same unusual place. Visited the same specific spot.
4. Formative experience parallel (high)
Both military veterans. Both first-generation immigrants. Both built something from zero. Both worked a manual-labor job before a desk job. Specific date or place beats abstract category.
5. Hobby / passion parallel (high — disarming)
Both Ironman triathletes. Both jazz pianists. Both run ultras. Both bake bread. Specificity matters: "like you, I'm 6 marathons in" beats "like you, I'm a runner."
6. Contrarian opinion parallel (highest — most memorable)
You both believe an unfashionable thing about the same topic. "Like you, I think the LLM-evals space is wildly under-priced. A recent paper from a frontier lab made the case better than I could." This signals you've read them carefully and you have your own brain. (In a real email, you'd name the specific paper and the specific lab — the placeholder above keeps the shape generic for the documentation.)
7. Unusual / coincidental detail (highest — disarming + memorable)
Both wear the same obscure watch brand. Both reference the same indie film. Both quote the same Greek philosopher. The more unusual, the better — these are the lines people screenshot.
8. Shared friction / shared frustration (high — earns trust)
Both have wrestled with the same hard problem. "Like you, I tried to ship X with Y constraint. I lost three months on it. I'd love your scar tissue." Vulnerability + specificity.
What to avoid (the wall of shame)
- "Like you, I believe in [generic industry truism]"
- "Like you, but at a smaller scale"
- "Like you, I'm passionate about complex problems"
- "Like you, I think AI will change the world"
- "Like you, I went to a top school"
- "Like you, I'm a builder" — what does that even mean
If your candidate hook fits any of these patterns, throw it out and look harder.
Output format
## Top 5 connection angles, ranked
### 1. <One-line hook> [category, leverage score 1–10]
**The line as it could appear in the email:**
> "Like you, <specific genuine connection>."
**Why it works:** <one sentence>
**Source for the recipient detail:** <link>
**Source for the writer's detail:** <about-me.md line or equivalent>
### 2. <…>
### 3. <…>
### 4. <…>
### 5. <…>
## Notes
- <If two of the angles are close to each other, flag it — pick one>
- <If the writer's profile is thin in an area where the recipient is rich, name it as a gap>
- <If you can't find five strong angles, say so. Better one great hook than five weak ones.>
How to use
- User says: "Find connections between me and [target]" or invokes after
recipient-research.
- Read
context/about-me.md (or equivalent).
- Read the dossier.
- Cross-reference for the eight categories above.
- Rank by leverage — contrarian opinions and unusual coincidences at the top.
- Hand off to
cold-email-coach or fun-angle.
When to flag a problem
If the only overlap you can find is generic ("we both went to Stanford"), tell the user honestly. That's a signal they should:
- Get a warm intro instead of going cold
- Pick a different target where the connection is stronger
- Lead with the offer rather than the connection (skip rule 5, double down on rule 10)
A weak connection forced into the email is worse than no connection.