| name | conversation-practices |
| description | The library of 1:1 and development-conversation practices (coaching arcs, feedback models, career & growth structures, relational lenses). Use to list, explain, recommend, or ground a 1:1 prep in proven practice. Extensible — add a practice by dropping a markdown file in practices/. |
Conversation practices library
A curated, extensible library of 1:1 and development-conversation practices, one markdown file per
practice in practices/. This skill is the grounding source for the prep and growth agents and a
browsable reference for the manager/coach.
What you can do with it
- List the available practices and what each is good for.
- Explain a practice (purpose, when to reach for it, steps, what to listen for, pitfalls).
- Recommend a structure for a moment (low energy, a stalled goal, a career question, a hard piece
of feedback, a relationship that's gone transactional).
- Ground a prep — when the
prep agent suggests questions or a shape for a 1:1, it cites a
practice that exists here.
Citation convention (important)
Practices are cited by slug — the filename without .md. Examples: grow-model,
situation-behavior-impact, career-conversation. A prep is "grounded" only if every cited slug
resolves to a practices/<slug>.md in this skill.
How to add a practice
- Copy
practices/_TEMPLATE.md to practices/<kebab-slug>.md.
- Fill the frontmatter (the index) and the prose body (the detail).
- Done — no code change. The agents and this skill glob
practices/*.md and pick it up.
Practice file shape: frontmatter index + prose body
Each practice is YAML frontmatter (machine-readable) followed by a markdown body (the rich detail).
Frontmatter fields:
slug (== filename) · name · type (arc | feedback | career | lens | check-in) ·
source · source_url · use_when (freeform tags — the situations this fits) · cadence
(any | periodic | as-needed) · tags (optional).
type meanings: arc = a shape for a whole conversation; feedback = a model for giving or
receiving feedback; career = a growth/development structure; lens = a way of reading what's
happening (no fixed steps); check-in = a short opener/temperature read.
Body sections: Purpose · When to use · Steps (or "How to read", for lenses) · What to listen for · Pitfalls · Note for the manager.
Recommending practices (use the frontmatter)
To recommend a structure for a moment, filter on frontmatter first, then judge fit from the body:
- Situation →
use_when / tags match what's going on (a stalled goal, a charged topic…).
- Type → need an arc for the whole talk, or just a feedback model for one moment?
- Cadence → is this an every-time tool or a now-and-then one?
Recommend a
type: lens entry as a way to read the conversation, never as a script to run.
The non-negotiable stance (every recommendation inherits this)
- Their agenda first. A 1:1 is the report's meeting, not the manager's status update.
- Observations, not verdicts. Talk about what was seen and its impact, never character labels.
- Coaching, not documentation. These practices grow a person; they are not for building a case
against one. See the
write-as-if-they-read-it principle.
- Listening over telling. The person doing the most talking is doing the most growing.
Sources, attribution & rights
Every practice file is an original, attributed summary — our own words describing a method, never a
reproduction of the source's text, question sets, worksheets, or branded materials. Full per-source
attribution, trademark, and rights status live in NOTICE.md. The whole repository
is MIT — none of these sources are Creative-Commons-licensed, so nothing imposes ShareAlike; the
summaries are our own. Underlying methods and trademarks belong to their originators; inclusion is
descriptive and implies no affiliation or endorsement. When adding a method, follow the four
gates in NOTICE.md.
Sources seeded so far
- The GROW model (Graham Alexander / John Whitmore) — coaching arc; widely used, described generically.
- Situation–Behavior–Impact (Center for Creative Leadership) — feedback model.
- Care & Challenge — feedback calibrated on two axes (care × challenge); a general management idea, described in our own words.
- The Coaching Habit (Michael Bungay Stanier) — the "stay curious longer" approach (we don't reproduce the signature question set — read the book).
- High-stakes conversations — handling hard, high-emotion talks; a general practice, described in our own words.
- Structural dynamics / four-player model (David Kantor; via Marsha Acker) — reading conversational
stuckness (shared with the facilitation library).
- Career conversations (Russ Laraway's three-conversation framework; Bill Campbell's coaching) —
growth and life-story conversations.
- Nonviolent Communication (Marshall Rosenberg) — observation/feeling/need/request.
Current practices
Grouped by type; cite by slug.
Conversation arcs (type: arc)
| Slug | Good for |
|---|
grow-model | A whole coaching conversation: Goal → Reality → Options → Will |
coaching-habit-questions | Staying curious before advising — the "and what else?" reflex |
their-agenda-first | The default 1:1 shape — their topics drive, you facilitate |
high-stakes-conversation | A high-stakes, high-emotion talk where the relationship is at risk |
Feedback models (type: feedback)
| Slug | Good for |
|---|
situation-behavior-impact | Specific, non-character feedback grounded in one moment |
care-and-challenge | Calibrating feedback on two axes: care personally AND challenge directly |
nonviolent-communication | Defusing a charged exchange: observation/feeling/need/request |
Career & growth (type: career)
| Slug | Good for |
|---|
career-conversation | The "where are you going" talk, separate from status |
delegation-levels | Growing someone by handing off at the right altitude |
strengths-spotting | Naming and deploying what someone is already good at |
Lenses & check-ins
| Slug | Source | Good for |
|---|
four-player-model | Kantor/Acker | Lens: read why a conversation is stuck (Move/Follow/Oppose/Bystand) |
energy-check-in | — | Check-in: a fast, honest read on how someone is actually doing |
