style-editing

name	style-editing
description	Apply Joseph Williams' clarity principles when writing or editing prose. Use when drafting technical or business writing, diagnosing unclear sentences, rewriting passive or abstract prose, or any time the user references Williams, "Style: Lessons in Clarity and Grace," or "Style: The Basics of Clarity and Grace."

Williams' Style: Clarity and Grace

Practical principles from Joseph M. Williams' Style: Lessons in Clarity and Grace (and the condensed Style: The Basics of Clarity and Grace). Use as a checklist when writing or editing prose that needs to be clear, direct, and reader-friendly.

Core philosophy

Williams' two foundational claims:

1. It is good to write clearly.
2. Anyone can write clearly, if they revise with the right principles in mind.

Skilled writers don't write clear sentences. They revise into them. Treat first drafts as raw material. Apply these principles in revision passes.

Clarity is reader-first: your job is to make the reader's work easy.

The two foundational principles

1. Characters as subjects, actions as verbs

The grammatical subject of a sentence should name the actual character (the agent doing something). The verb should name what that character does.

When the subject is an abstraction and the verb is weak, the sentence loses energy and clarity.

• Bad: "There was a decision by the committee to approve the budget."

• Good: "The committee decided to approve the budget."

• Bad: "The intention of the team was the implementation of a new policy."

• Good: "The team intended to implement a new policy."

Diagnostic question for any unclear sentence: Who is doing what? If the answer is buried in nouns and prepositions, rewrite so the actor is the subject and the action is the verb.

2. Avoid nominalizations

A nominalization is a verb (or adjective) converted into a noun. They drain action from prose.

Common signs:

• Words ending in -tion, -ment, -ance, -ence, -al, -ity, -ness in subject position
• Phrases like "make a decision," "conduct an analysis," "give consideration to"

Rewrites:

• "Make a decision" → "decide"
• "Conduct an analysis of" → "analyze"
• "Give consideration to" → "consider"
• "Reach an agreement" → "agree"
• "Have a discussion about" → "discuss"

When you spot a nominalization in subject or object position, ask: can I turn it back into a verb and find a real character to do it?

Voice and emphasis

3. Active over passive (with exceptions)

Default to active voice. Use passive only when:

• The agent is unknown ("My car was stolen.")
• The agent is unimportant or obvious
• You need to keep the subject consistent across sentences (cohesion — see below)
• You want to put the agent at the end of the sentence for emphasis (stress position)

Active voice puts the character first, where the reader expects to find it.

4. Stress position: end of sentence carries weight

Readers feel the natural emphasis of a sentence at its end. Put the most important new information there.

• Weak: "Climate change is the most pressing issue facing humanity, in my opinion."

• Strong: "In my opinion, the most pressing issue facing humanity is climate change."

• Weak: "Agenta is the AI reliability layer that closes that gap, fundamentally."

• Strong: "The gap is what Agenta closes."

When revising, ask: what's the most important word or idea in this sentence? Is it landing in the stress position?

Cohesion across sentences

5. Old before new

Each sentence should start with information the reader already knows (from the previous sentence or shared context) and end with new information. This creates a chain readers can follow effortlessly.

• Choppy: "Photosynthesis converts sunlight to energy. The Calvin cycle is the second stage of photosynthesis. Carbon fixation happens in the Calvin cycle."
• Cohesive: "Photosynthesis converts sunlight to energy. The second stage of photosynthesis is the Calvin cycle, which fixes carbon."

In the cohesive version, each sentence picks up where the last one left off.

6. Topic strings (consistent subjects across a paragraph)

A paragraph has a "topic string" — the chain of grammatical subjects across its sentences. When the topic string is consistent, the paragraph feels unified. When subjects keep changing, the paragraph feels scattered.

Diagnostic: list the grammatical subject of each sentence in the paragraph. If the list is "team / data / system / users / process / our approach," the paragraph has no topic string. Pick one anchor character (often the most important agent in the paragraph) and rewrite so most sentences share that subject.

This is what passive voice is good for: it lets you keep the same subject across sentences even when the action changes hands.

7. Topic + body + close in paragraphs

Each paragraph should:

• Open with a controlling sentence (the issue or claim)
• Develop it in the body
• Close with a sentence that points forward, names the consequence, or summarises

Don't bury the controlling idea in the middle. The opening sets the topic; the close earns the stress position.

Concision

8. Cut what you don't need

Williams' favourite categories of cuts:

Wordy phrases:

• "due to the fact that" → "because"
• "in order to" → "to"
• "at this point in time" → "now"
• "for the purpose of" → "to"
• "in the event that" → "if"
• "with regard to" → "about"
• "the fact that" → usually deletable

Doublets (keep one of each pair):

• "each and every"
• "first and foremost"
• "any and all"
• "true and accurate"

Empty modifiers:

• very, really, basically, actually, literally, essentially, simply, quite, rather

Throat-clearing openers:

• "I think that..."
• "It should be noted that..."
• "It is important to remember that..."

Redundant pairs:

• "free gift" (gifts are free)
• "advance planning" (planning is in advance)
• "end result" (results are at the end)

9. Sentence length: vary it on purpose

Mix short and long sentences. A short sentence after a long one creates emphasis. A run of short sentences in a row gets choppy. A run of long sentences in a row gets exhausting.

Read your prose aloud. The rhythm should breathe.

Grace (the optional layer)

10. Parallel structure

When you list or contrast, use parallel grammatical structure so the reader sees the parallel meaning.

• Bad: "She likes hiking, swimming, and to bike."

• Good: "She likes hiking, swimming, and biking."

• Bad: "The product is fast, reliable, and you can scale it."

• Good: "The product is fast, reliable, and scalable."

11. Balanced sentences

Two parallel halves separated by a comma, semicolon, or colon create rhythm and emphasis.

• "Demos are easy. Reliability isn't."
• "They iterate on prompts; the system iterates on them."

Use sparingly. Overused, balance becomes mannered.

12. End on the strongest word

When you have a choice, arrange the sentence so the strongest word lands last. The reader's ear hears it as the point.

Ethics

13. Write to others as you'd want them to write to you

Avoid:

• Jargon that excludes readers who don't share your specialty
• Hedges that obscure responsibility ("mistakes were made")
• Complexity used to signal authority rather than clarify
• Vague language that lets you avoid commitment

If you'd be frustrated reading what you've written, revise.

A working diagnostic checklist

When editing a draft, run through:

1. Subject test. What is the grammatical subject of each sentence in the paragraph? Is there a topic string? If not, pick an anchor character and rewrite.
2. Verb test. Are the verbs concrete actions, or weak constructions ("is," "has," "makes," "does")? Look for nominalizations to convert back to verbs.
3. Voice test. Each passive sentence: is it passive for a reason? If not, flip to active.
4. Stress position test. What word ends each sentence? Is it the most important word, or a throwaway?
5. Cut test. Read each sentence and ask: which words can I delete without losing meaning? Cut them.
6. Length test. Read aloud. Does the rhythm vary? Do any sentences run on or chop short without purpose?
7. Reader test. If you were the reader, would you understand this on first read?

When to apply this skill

• Drafting any prose where clarity matters: technical writing, sales copy, internal memos, exec summaries, blog posts, documentation
• Editing or revising prose that feels dense, abstract, or passive
• Diagnosing why a paragraph feels off
• When the user references Williams, Style: Lessons in Clarity and Grace, Style: The Basics of Clarity and Grace, "old-before-new," "topic string," or "stress position"

This skill complements ai-writing-tropes (which lists patterns to avoid). Williams gives the positive principles; tropes gives the negative ones.

Sources

• Williams, Joseph M. and Bizup, Joseph. Style: Lessons in Clarity and Grace. (Ten editions, the foundational text.)
• Williams, Joseph M. Style: The Basics of Clarity and Grace. (Condensed, paperback companion.)
• Williams, Joseph M. Style: Toward Clarity and Grace. (Earlier title in the same family.)