eulogy-and-obituary-writer

# Eulogy & Obituary Writer When you have to put a whole person into words while grieving, the blank page is cruel. This helps you write a eulogy or obituary that's true and warm — built from your actual memories rather than clichés, shaped to the setting, carrying the specific stories that made them them, and delivered in a way that survives your own tears. You bring the memories; this helps them become the piece. ## What This Skill Produces - **A draft in your voice** — a eulogy or obituary written from the details and stories you share, not generic filler - **The right shape** — structure and length for the setting (a spoken eulogy vs. a printed obituary), so it fits the moment - **The details that make it theirs** — the specific quirks, phrases, and moments that bring them to life better than adjectives - **Tone guidance** — the balance of grief and warmth (and humor, if it's true to them), pitched to the audience - **Delivery help (eulogy)** — length for speaking, how to handle breaking down, a printed copy, a backup reader - **Obituary essentials** — the facts, survivors, and service/donation details an obituary needs, in the conventional order ## Required Inputs Ask for these if not provided: - **Who they were** — name, relationship to you, a few facts (age, what they did, who survives them) - **Your memories** — stories, quirks, phrases, moments — the raw material (the more specific, the better) - **The setting** — spoken eulogy or printed obituary, audience, and any length limit - **The tone you want** — solemn, warm, a little funny — whatever is true to them ## Framework: Their Specifics Over Clichés 1. **Gather the specifics.** The one story only you know beats every "she was a loving mother." Draw out concrete memories, phrases, habits — those are the piece. 2. **Choose the shape.** Eulogy (spoken, personal, ~3–5 minutes) vs. obituary (printed, factual + brief tribute) — the form dictates structure and length. 3. **Open with something true and small.** A specific image or line pulls people in more than a grand statement. 4. **Build around a few stories.** Two or three real moments carry more than a list of virtues — let the stories imply the person. 5. **Match the tone to them.** If they were funny, be a little funny; if solemn, honor that — truth over decorum. 6. **Prepare the delivery.** For a eulogy: printed large, paced for tears, with a backup reader ready — so grief doesn't steal the words. ## Output Format ### For [name] — [eulogy / obituary] **Draft:** > [the piece, in the writer's voice, built from their memories] **Why it's shaped this way:** [structure/length for the setting]. **Details that made it theirs:** [the specific stories/quirks used]. **Tone:** [solemn / warm / lightly funny — matched to them]. **Delivery (eulogy):** [print large · pace for tears · backup reader ready]. **Obituary essentials (if applicable):** [facts · survivors · service/donation details]. ## Quality Checks - [ ] Built from the writer's specific memories, not clichés - [ ] Correct form/length for eulogy vs. obituary - [ ] Anchored in two or three real stories - [ ] Tone true to the person, in the writer's voice - [ ] Includes delivery help (eulogy) or the required facts (obituary) ## Anti-Patterns - **Generic virtues** ("kind, loving, generous") with no specifics. - **Cramming in everything** instead of a few resonant stories. - **A tone that isn't theirs** — solemn for someone who was joyful. - **Forgetting delivery** — an unreadable wall of text at the podium. - **Missing obituary facts** — survivors, service details, donations. ## Example Trigger Phrases - "Help me write a eulogy for my father." - "I have to speak at the funeral and I don't know where to start." - "Write an obituary for my grandmother." - "I don't know how to put who she was into words." - "How long should a eulogy be and how do I get through it?"