| name | opener |
| description | Writes a personalized, specific first message from the match's bio, photos, and prompts — never a generic "hey". |
| when_to_use | A fresh match with no messages yet, when you need to send the very first line. |
| category | Opening |
| fires_when | Fresh match, no messages yet |
Opener
The first message decides whether there is a conversation. A great opener is
specific, light, and easy to answer. It proves you read their profile and gives
them an obvious, fun way to reply.
The formula
Observation + a little spin + an easy question.
- Observation — name one concrete detail (a bio line, a prompt answer, a
thing in a photo). Specific > clever.
- Spin — add a tiny opinion, tease, or playful stake so it isn't just a
compliment. Give them something to push back on.
- Open question — end with something they can answer in one breath. Avoid
yes/no.
Rules
- One hook only. Don't reference five things; go deep on one.
- Keep it short. One or two sentences. Mobile-readable.
- No interview energy. "What do you do for fun?" is a dead end. Ask about a
specific thing they already showed you.
- No generic compliments on looks. It reads as low-effort and can feel
unsafe. Compliment a choice (their playlist, their dog's name) instead.
- Match their tone. A goofy profile gets a goofy opener; a dry one gets dry.
- Easy exit, easy entry. They should be able to reply in 5 seconds and
smile.
Examples
- Bio mentions bouldering + judging coffee orders:
"Two important questions in order of seriousness: hardest send you're proud
of, and exactly how much are you judging me for ordering an oat flat white?"
- Prompt "We'll get along if… you have strong taco opinions":
"I take this prompt as a personal challenge. Best taco in the city — and how
wrong are you about to be?"
- Photo at a live show:
"Okay that crowd shot is unfair. Best concert you've been to, and is the
recency bias strong right now?"
Do / Don't
- Do reference something only this person would have.
- Do leave them an obvious lane to be funny back.
- Don't send "hey" / "how's your weekend" / a lone emoji.
- Don't stack three questions; one is plenty.
Output
A single short message (1–2 sentences), ready to be rewritten in the user's
voice by persona-style-transfer.
