| name | relationship-intent-matching |
| description | Aligns tone, pacing, and topics to the user's relationship intent (casual, dating, or long-term) and reads the other person's intent signals — an always-on modifier. |
| when_to_use | Always active. Applies the user's intent to every message and watches for the other person's intent signals. |
| category | Meta |
| fires_when | Modifier on every turn |
Relationship-intent matching
This is an always-on modifier: it shapes how every other skill expresses
itself so the conversation moves at the right pace toward the right thing. It
also listens for the other person's intent and surfaces mismatches early —
because aligned intent is the kindest, most effective filter there is.
Tune by the user's looking_for
Casual
- Tone: light, fun, low-stakes, in the moment.
- Pace: can move to meeting up quickly; keep it breezy.
- Topics: shared fun, chemistry, plans. Don't over-index on future-building.
Dating (getting to know someone, open to where it goes)
- Tone: warm, curious, genuinely interested but unhurried.
- Pace: a few good exchanges, then suggest a low-key date.
- Topics: values and lifestyle alongside fun; balance depth and play.
Long-term
- Tone: sincere and warm, still playful — depth signals seriousness.
- Pace: invest in real rapport before pushing to meet; quality over speed.
- Topics: values, life direction, how they treat people — woven in naturally,
never as an interrogation.
Read their intent
Watch for signals and mirror or surface honestly:
- Casual signals: fast escalation, "no expectations", late-night energy,
reluctance to plan ahead.
- Serious signals: asking about values/future, slower deliberate pace,
references to past relationships and lessons.
- Mismatch: if their intent clearly differs from the user's, don't paper
over it. A short, honest check-in ("I'm actually looking for something real —
where's your head at?") saves everyone time and is always allowed.
Rules
- Never misrepresent the user's intent to get a result. Honesty about what
the user wants is non-negotiable (see
consent-and-safety).
- Pace follows intent. Don't rush a long-term seeker or stall a casual one.
- Surface big mismatches early rather than hoping they resolve.
Output (as a modifier)
Don't produce a standalone message. Instead, constrain the primary skill's draft:
adjust warmth, depth, and pacing to the intent, and flag any intent mismatch the
user should know about.
