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Use when preparing for or training on difficult conversations — performance issues, terminations, conflict, harassment reports, RIFs.
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| name | difficult-conversations |
| description | Use when preparing for or training on difficult conversations — performance issues, terminations, conflict, harassment reports, RIFs. |
The structure of any difficult conversation:
Most failure is in preparation (or absence) and opening (waffling rather than naming the situation).
"Thanks for coming. I have hard news. We're ending your employment with [Company], effective today. The reason is [specific, brief]. The decision is final. I want to walk you through what happens next."
Then: severance, final paycheck, benefits, equity, references, equipment, personal items, allow space.
Avoid:
"I have difficult news. As part of the changes we announced today, your role is being eliminated, effective [date]. This isn't about your performance — you've been [genuine recognition]. The decision is about [stated reason]."
Then: severance, outplacement, references, alumni network, logistics, Q&A.
"I want to talk about your performance. Over the last [period], I've raised concerns about [specific gaps — referencing prior conversations]. We're at a point where I want to be direct: if these gaps don't close in [30/60/90 days], we won't be able to keep you in this role. Here's a written plan of what I need to see, the support I'll provide, and how we'll measure success."
Then: walk through plan, confirm support, clarify check-ins, be clear about both outcomes.
The PIP must not be a surprise.
"I want to talk with you about a change to your role. Based on [specific observations], I think you'd be more successful — and the team better served — if you moved into [new role]. Your title will be [X], and your comp will [stay / adjust over Y months / change]. Here's why I think this is the right call, and I want to hear what you think."
Avoid: pretending it's a great opportunity; vague language about "better fit."
"I want to talk about your promotion. I appreciate the interest, and I want to be honest about where things stand. The calibration discussion concluded that you're not ready for [next level] yet, for these specific reasons: [evidence]. Here's what I think you'd need to demonstrate."
"I want to walk you through your comp adjustment. Your increase is [X], which is [position relative to range]. Here's how it was decided. [Walk through inputs.] I know this may differ from what you were hoping for. Happy to talk through any of it."
Avoid: "It's all I could do"; comparing to peers; promising future raises that aren't yours to promise.
When mediating:
Avoid mediating when one party should be coached separately first, or when power asymmetry can't be resolved.
The manager's role is usually:
Investigation is HR / legal's job; response and escalation is the manager's.
Difficult conversations cost emotional bandwidth. The cost of doing several poorly is greater than the cost of doing fewer well.
difficult-conversations-coach agentdignity-in-transitions rulefeedback-frameworks skillpolicy-writer agent (documentation)offboarding-architect agentUse when designing or applying progressive discipline — covers the escalating sequence, documentation, gross misconduct exceptions, and consistency.
Use when conducting or scoping workplace investigations — covers intake, scope, interview protocols, evidence, findings, and outcomes.
Use when auditing or designing the candidate's journey — covers communication, time, transparency, and the link between candidate experience and employer brand.
Use when designing career frameworks, level rubrics, IC and management track parity, and promotion processes.
Use when planning organizational change — covers communication architecture, sequencing, manager enablement, and predictable failure modes.
Use when training managers in coaching skills — covers GROW, listening, asking vs. telling, and growth mindset framing.